quislings don't scream
Jason: 'You'll never find the body' is such a boring threat. A better threat would be; 'You'll never stop finding the body.'
Tim, bored: Or just say, 'They'll be finding parts of you for at least four months...and you'll still be alive for three of them.'
Jason: Now that's a threat!
Dick, covering Damians ears: *horrified silence*
the batkids will deliberately get jason into their favorite pieces of media so he’ll write fanfiction for it.
dick discovered this strategy when he forced jason to watch one of his favorite shows with him. he’d totally forgotten that the show ended on a cliffhanger before it was cancelled, but rewatching it brought back that feeling of dissatisfaction he had the first time around. so dick opens up the ao3 tag for the show and to his surprise, there’s a brand new fic addressing every single loose end, complete with beautiful prose and amazing characterization. dick practically weeps. it’s only when he realizes some of the things in the fic match up with the rants jason had during their watch of the show that he has barbara confirm his suspicions about who the author is.
somehow everybody but jason gets wind of this and they’re taking unashamed advantage of it. the next time they see a movie together, stephanie leans over to jason to whisper about the romantic potential between two characters. she gets like three fics for her ship out of that. when jason goes outside, barbara switches electronic billboards and redirects taxis with ads for her favorite show. and of course, every targeted ad on his phone and computer are for the same show. when he finally gives in and watches it, barbara ends up with plenty of content to get her through the between seasons break.
everybody in jason’s family is subscribed to the ao3 account that he doesn’t know they know he has. one day, they’re all chilling in the library, and at the same time jason publishes his latest fic (for a movie bruce of all people was very insistent he watch), everybody’s email notifications go off. he narrows his eyes suspiciously. “just some wayne enterprises stuff.” “got a package delivered.” “what’s an email?”
it’s fine. he’ll let them get away with it. besides, he does the same thing to damian to get fanart out of him.
ten years of fighting and when shit hits the fan tumblr instantly has reddit's back. the greatest enemies to lovers story ever told.
tim standing over jasons bed in his safe house in the middle of the night like some kind of paralysis demon:
arise, motherfucker. im having a crisis
Batman AU where the batfam is an extension of Gotham’s will so they can’t leave the city without taking a piece of it with them
Bruce, ever practical, has a batarang made from a steel piece off the bat signal (not that he’d be able to throw it but it’s a backup nonetheless)
Dick, Jay, and Tim have made it Robin tradition to carry pebbles in their pockets (the justice league has come to associate the soft jingling of rocks with the arrival of the Dark Knight)
Steph finds pretty rocks and quartz to crack open and share with Cassandra- and they cycle through their newest finds (cass does keep a shiny piece of obsidian in her utility belt, it was the first one Steph gave her)
Duke keeps a corner from a road sign in his pouch, the reflective yellow paint matches his theme- (what better representation of the city than perpetual construction)
Damian reverently carries a piece of deep green sea glass from the harbor. The color reminds him of his mother, and he finds the beauty fitting. (The irony that the only way for him to leave his new home is an echo of the reason he’s there in the first place is not lost on him.)
I have more thoughts on this- also thank you to everyone who’s liked and reblogged ily <3
The item they take doesn’t exactly have to have sentimental value- it can be anything random
Early on in his time of knowing the Batman, Clark was perplexed. The man(?) moved like a ghost, melting into shadows or plain disappearing as of on a whim. As he paid more attention, however, there was one thing he noticed as (seemingly) mundane from the Bat. He liked to collect rocks. Every time Clark had come to get Batman for league reasons that took the man (he’s still not completely sure) out of his dwelling, he’d take a few moments to skate a hand across the ground-gentle and searching- until he came up with a rock he deemed just right before nodding and following Clark without a word.
Clark never said anything, too afraid to make Batman hide more of himself after being noticed.(as he was known to do)
I have thoughts!
So where I love there is a local legend about a curse set on the area. Basically it comes down to you cannot move away without taking some part of the area with you(dirt/rocks/earth) or you're going to come back. Obviously we don't spawn point back here, and it's more of a moving away thing than a visiting else where thing, BUT! There are some key points i think would be fun to bring to this AU.
People who have moved here don't know about the curse unless they're told about it. Often if they have kids their kids won't know if they were never told. And more often than not those of us that grew up with the knowledge are shocked when someone doesn't know. Also conversations like
"I've tried to move away so many times and I just keep coming back here." Laughing of the unknowning.
"sounds like the curse to me." A knowing says also laughing.
"the what?"
"you know...the curse?" And the proceeding to explain said curse.
Also what is needed to leave changes. We've got lots of mountains around us, and there's almost a debate on which mountain you need dirt from. I've heard it has to be a rock from the river. It can be any dirt/rock according to some. Has to be dirt from the river bed. Ect. Lots of stories. For her graduating class, my highschool art teacher made us all ceramic cups glazed with dirt collected from around the different places.
Also there's the. "I'll make it home" after a long trip mentality "regardless of how I drive". The idea is you can't die anywhere. But within the area. Because if you do the curse can't force you to come home.
Cass is out on patrol and sees Polka Dot Man trying to rob a Dollar General. After she shoos him away, she wanders down an aisle and soon finds the most absurd item in the store.
Cass, in full costume, approaching the cashier: How much?
Paul the Cashier, a fifty year old man who has been working night shifts in Gotham for over thirty years: Just take it. Christ.
—
Later that week:
Tim, stepping into the shower, sees this peeking out at him from behind his shampoo:
Tim: …okay
Tim, texting Cass: Did you give me a Rainbow Batman?
Cass: Pass along the Rainbow Batman for good luck
—
Jason, returning to his safe house after a long night, opens the fridge and sees Rainbow Batman standing knee-deep in his potato salad.
Jason: fuck is this
Tim, texting him seconds later: Pass along Rainbow Batman for good luck.
—
Over the next few months, Rainbow Batman circulates its way around most of the Bat-team. It bounces from Jason to Dick to Damian to Steph. Eventually it gets to Duke, who is tasked with presenting it to Bruce. He waits until Bruce is in a decent mood, then puts it on the driver’s seat of the Batmobile one night as they are all wrapping up a case.
Bruce, opening the Batmobile door: —thank you for your help, Dick. I know you’ve been busy. And Duke, I appreciate you altering your schedule for us. Steph, your intel was excellent. I’m very pleased with the outcome of this mission. You all managed to keep the insubordination at a tolerable level.
Jason, whispering to Dick: Damn, two thank-yous, a compliment, and only one passive-aggressive comment? Did he get laid or something?
Bruce, spotting the Rainbow Batman: I…
Bruce:
Bruce: This??
Bruce: Is this…
Duke, about to explain: Cass found it—
Bruce, clearly trying to process something, blurts out: Is this your way of telling me you all know about Clark?
Everyone:
Jason: called it
Butches, goths, dykes, and other lovely women joined in the intricate ritual of sitting/bending down and loosening the laces on their favorite big boots
starting w/ red!! i got prompted both jason and miles but i couldn’t choose so i drew both
clone boy & his robin
I love your work so dearly, was just wondering if you'd done any Duke Thomas solo pieces before??
